Monday February 24, the day after February ACT scores posted online, the junior class at AHS had a ninety seven percent attendance rate, which was actually higher than any school day so far this year, and all the students at school managed to complete the day without having any meltdowns and or hospital visits.

It seems that the junior student class has finally come to the realization that doing poorly on the ACT doesn’t actually ruin the rest of your life.

AHS student Troy Story was interviewed the night before the test and in his interview he commented on the seriousness of the ACT.

“I know it’s hard to believe, but, in fact, I am home on this Friday night trying to study for the ACT,” Story said. “Normally I am the life of the party every weekend, but I understand that if I don’t do well on this test I will be homeless, and from what I’ve seen, homeless people don’t party. So if I want to continue my life full of great memories and three meals-a-day, I know I have to score above a 14.”

Story was unable to continue the interview because of a sudden anxiety attack. However the morning after scores were released Story gained a new perspective on testing.

“Last night I got my scores back and instead of getting the 14 that I needed, I in fact got a score much lower. After I saw this score, I began to pack a few essentials and the next morning I would take to the streets,” Story said. “But, the next morning I woke up and my mom had made me breakfast. That is when I realized that my life wasn’t over. I could still live in a house. I didn’t need to be homeless; I could still live with my mom. The ACT didn’t ruin my life.”

Another junior at AHS had a similar experience prior to the ACT. Jacquelyn McDime also took the state issued ACT February 8, and received her scores the 23.

“For the past three weeks I have really been trying to gain weight because I know that once the ACT scores come out there is a chance I will no longer have regular access to food,” McDime said. “This four hour test can really determine the path for the rest of my life, so I know that if I didn’t do well any hopes and dreams I had are forever over.”

After receiving her scores, McDime actually hasn’t given up.

“The morning after my ACT scores were released, I was shocked that I could actually pour milk into a bowl of cereal,” McDime said. “I went to school and everything was normal; my teacher asked what the answer to this math problem was and I remember being able to correctly answer the question. Just like it had been before the ACT scores were released.”

It has now been 10 hours since the scores were released and students, parents, and teachers have all returned back to their normal lives.

“Even though I spend close to half-a-million dollars on tutoring, and my daughter’s computer burst into flames from so much Prep-Me, I know that she can still survive without a 36 on her ACT,” AHS parent and current billionaire housewife said. “I mean look at me.”

The ACT still seems to perplex AHS principal Catherine Mathabane.

“It’s funny how a test that can ruin your life doesn’t actually have any affect on your life after all. ”