Imagine this: you introduce your friend to an artist or song you love. He’s awestruck (obviously); you bond over how amazing your music taste is, and he adds it to his playlist. Later, he puts the same song over a mid-at-best fit-check, and everyone is obsessed with his “indie/underground/diverse” taste. #notcool
Now look, I’m not a gatekeeper. I’ll happily direct anyone to Frank Ocean’s best songs (which you can only find on SoundCloud). I am a firm believer that every person deserves the gift of good music; that’s how artists become successful in the first place. However, when I hear Fiona Apple blasting at the function from a Timothee Chalamet-lookalike’s phone, and he claims he found it himself, I get suspicious. Sue me.
The theme of guys becoming cool for simply enjoying stereotypically “feminine” things, in general, is a trend I, for one, am sick and tired of. While painting your nails, wearing pink, and listening to Clario is great and all, it doesn’t necessarily warrant foaming at the mouth for some Depop-wearing fashion TikToker. I think straight women of this generation have gotten too wrapped up in seeing one kind of guy – the gym-going, truck-loving, probably really-into-cars guy (we all know him), and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. It’s human nature to reject “stereotypical” traits we deem “ordinary”; we’re all guilty of trying to stand out. However, stealing the interesting aspects of your peers because they look “cooler” on you is not human nature.
If you didn’t want to read all of that or need a synopsis, my basic point is to stop worshipping men for enjoying the same things you do. If your jaw wouldn’t drop if you saw Faye Webster on your best friend’s playlist, do not, I repeat, do not, treat the basic guy from your English class any differently. It’s extremely reminiscent of women routinely being overlooked time and time again in the music industry- think Doechii, a great artist who has been making music since 2019. Her music has always been great, however, she didn’t get the real recognition she deserved until she was featured this past year on Chromakopia, Tyler the Creator’s album.
And before the critics say “blah blah blah, Tyler the Creator is a popular artist, it’s not just because he’s a man, yadda yadda yadda.” I offer you this,
Persuasive by SZA and Doechii: 2022
Phenomenal by Janelle Monae Ft. Doechii: 2023
Swamp B*tches by Doechii and Rico Nasty: 2022
All collaborations with successful women in the music industry, all phenomenal songs (pun intended). However, her following was nowhere near as big as it was until Chromakopia dropped in 2024… See my point now?
These are just some examples, but this happens all the time. Not just in the music industry or in petty predicaments like some dude stealing your music taste and playing it off as his own, but in everything from fashion to language. It’s time that we collectively stop encouraging this weird performative behavior. It’s cool to like Lorde and Charli xcx and whoever else, if you actually like them. Stop latching onto other people’s interests or what TikTok tells you to like just because you think it’ll make your “persona” cooler or get people to like you. Interests are unique to who you are, it’s not just a costume to put on to make you someone you’re not.