SATIRE — Following the updated furniture and layout of the AHS Commons during the 2023-2024 school year, many students were heard voicing their frustrations in protest outside of the administration offices.

The protests heavily distracted administrators from the draining and difficult job of pushing the button to let people inside the school. The unrest caused by the furniture in the commons and the protests in response caused the administration to make a change. In order for the commons to become more navigable and for the administration to be able to get back to button-pushing, there has been an executive decision made to replace all of the furniture in the commons with a corn maze.

AHS Freshman Anita Break has only ever known the common’s new configuration and believes that now with the corn maze, it is even better.

“I was really scared about coming to high school and getting lost, the first week the commons opened it happened!” Break said, “Now with the corn maze there are so many fewer traffic issues and I can actually get to class on time.”

The addition of the corn maze has created positive change throughout the school so much so that the other schools in the district are considering implementing this as well. AHS principal, Sarah Strasshotdog has been very pleased with the outcome of this upgrade.

“Students seem to have been getting to class on time, and have told me they feel less distracted and happier while walking through the commons,” Strasshotdog said.

Although there are many positive aspects of the corn maze commons, 15 students have gotten lost. Ten of the missing students have since been found in the past two months. Some students were skipping class and got lost while running from Burger Oliver, the vice principal; others were on the hunt for cookies.

“It was really scary and I thought for a second that I wanted to be able to leave, but eventually I found my way into the science wing. I still love the corn maze though, best addition ever,” AHS Senior Paige Turner said.