SATIRE — This Saturday at 3:06 am Donald Trump’s Twitter account was deleted by a rogue hacker, 22-year-old Smarty Pants.

“His account was extremely easy to hack into because his password was, iamagenius123. From then on it was smooth sailing,” Pants said.
Five minutes after it was deactivated the government declared a national emergency. Riots broke out along streets and a copy of the purge happened in Houston, Texas. A gas station rioter, Nasty woman, was the first to comment on the incident.
“I just don’t know what I’ll do without Trump’s insightful comments, helpful advice, and his inability to lie when telling the world what is really going on,” Nasty said.
While the United States is in its own panic over the loss of the account, other countries are very concerned. The president of France, Fran French-Fry, addressed his concern in a national crisis meeting.
“We are very concerned that we have lost all contact with the United States. Trump’s twitter account was the only way we knew what was going on in the states,” French-Fry said.
Trump’s account included so many important insights on the world that are now gone. For example, he once predicted the future in this tweet,
“Sadly, because President Obama has done such a poor job as president, you won’t see another black president for years!” Trump said.
No one knows what will happen with the future of the United States. Without contact with the president, the country is in an extremely vulnerable state. North Korea is already plotting to launch a nuclear missile at America because Trump doesn’t have access to his, “Bigger nuclear missile launch button,” that is also, “on his desk at all times,”

The future of America is hanging by a thread.