SATIRE- Aspen High School senior Sally Hinton received a restraining order last Tuesday after the alleged stalking and violation of personal property against classmate Paul Floyd. Hinton was found chasing Floyd through the science wing screaming, “My horoscope told me it was you\; we are in love!”

For Hinton, each day begins by making her way to Astrology.com in search of destiny. She religiously reads her horoscope each day, referring to the daily reading as “the Bible”. Hinton described her horoscope for last Tuesday, March 21st, as a sign in her life. She explains the horoscope as stating that she would find the love of her life that day, and it would be someone she wouldn’t be expecting.

Hinton explained that her horoscope, for Libra, stated, “Today the moons have aligned as Mercury comes into retrograde, making it Libra’s time to shine in the romance department. Be on the lookout today for that special someone\; they are waiting for you. Keep your mind clear as this person may not be the person you expect it to be”

In Hinton’s first period class, it became clear who this special someone was. Hinton describes how when her classmate, Paul Floyd, entered the classroom late with his jeans sagging and unwashed hair, she knew that he was the one that her Horoscope was alluding to.

“It was like a lightbulb going off in my head. Of course, it was Paul! It has always been Paul,” Hinton said.

Floyd didn’t realize what was happening until he heard Hinton call his name after the first period. He said that it all went downhill from there.

“Hinton ran towards me at full speed and went straight in for the kiss. After dodging it, I began walking away but she persisted until I was running full speed down the halls, and she kept screaming ‘You are the one!’” Floyd said.

Hinton was eventually tackled to the ground by AHS security, Hall Pufangle, and taken into custody at the Pitkin County Jail Tuesday afternoon.

Hinton defends her actions stating that “My horoscope told me that I would fall in love. What is so wrong with following my destiny?”