SATIRE—Some new information has been leaked on Chinese twitter about new information about the real source of the coronavirus outbreak, Two months before Russian spies infiltrated 3 labs in a 30-mile radius of the initial outbreak in Wuhan, China.

Due to the nations leader, Ronald Drumpf, and his connection with the Russiansrussians, an exclusive interviewinteriview with one of the spies talks about what his mission included.

“Our mission was to find different steroids that the Chinese were experimenting with so we could make our leader [Bladimir Vootin] an unstoppable leader. But we ended up finding the scientist doing tests of different animals including bats,” said Виктор (Viktor) 1st in command of the Russian army.

The tests that were being done are believed to create a new biological weapon to use against North Korea. The Chinese government did years of research to create a virus that would infect millions of soldiers so Kim K Un would be less of a global threat.

Russia was sent to China after whistleblowers claimed countless performance enduring drugs were being produced for Chinese bodybuilders and athletes for the upcoming 2020 Olympic games in Tokyo, Japan.

The Chinese are a top producer for performance-enhancing drugs, so the Russian saw that as a great opportunity especially with the new election in the United States. Bladimir Vootin may lose a crucial connection in the White House with Ronald Drumpf.
In an exclusive interview with Putin explains his reasoning for taking steroids.

“With the possibility of Mr. Drumpf not remaining in office, Mother Russia won’t know what is happening in the White House. The Russian government had a crucial role in his election, but it is too risky to help him once again. Russia must be a superpower against other nations, and it all starts with a powerful leader,” Vootin said.

When the Russian spies found the experimentation of animals they didn’t know specifically what was happening so they didn’t think anything of the incident. Once the outbreak of the virus was found to be caused by bat soup, the Russians knew that the Chinese government was behind it all. An interview with a Russianrussian spy, Leonid Sshplitz, who contracted the viruses, shows the effect on his “clout”.

“Before Ii contracted the virus Ii had over 300k followers on TikTok. As a spy it is the only way Ii can refocusrefocuse my mind. Once my followers found out that Ii contracted the virus my follower count went down dramaticallydramaticly, all the way down to 115k. I dont knowwo what Ii did to deserve this, my life as going so well and now my TikToktiktok has been effected.” Shplitz said.