The student news site of Aspen High School


The student news site of Aspen High School


The student news site of Aspen High School


If You Give a Mouse a Cookie

Haley Schmela
AHS students at lunch in the commons.

“If you give a mouse a cookie, he’s going to ask for a glass of milk. When you give him the milk, he’ll probably ask you for a straw. When he’s finished, he’ll ask for a napkin”. If you give Haley and I the opportunity to be a boy for a week, we would be pleased.

Growing up with a twin, I have only seen the pros of being a male. All you have to do is wake up in the morning without any worries but what girl you are going to Snapchat? While the average girl bulges her eyes out overthinking her outfit, a boy re-wears the same pj pants and stained hoodie every day.

The girl sets her alarm 30 minutes prior to the existing one just so she can have time to shower, dry her hair, and maybe come up with a decent outfit. However, being around two boys day and night I have adjusted to the customs of their daily routines. And I shared my passion with Lauren, who I knew would be equally as excited for my discoveries.

To begin we discussed the coolest attributes of being a boy. The number one is friendship. Boys only ever have a good time, all the time. If a problem comes in the way of the brotherhood instead of a conversation they quickly jump to a knuckle sandwich, and all is well again.

Secondly, they don’t share clothes. Which is a pro in the books for them. Not having to worry about where their lucky pair of underwear went. Nor will they ever be frustrated when seeing the t-shirt they spent their monthly paycheck on, being worn better by their best friend and soon to never be seen again.

The automatic second language they learn by the age of five rolls off their tongue. “First down, second string, and Margot Robbie” seems to have no translations in the Cosmopolitan magazine. We try our hardest to keep up but in reality, we know there is no use. I would love to plan my days around the Red Zoneand the six o’clock kick-off, instead of working a nine-to-five.

The number one purchase in the item shop for these boys is officially ginger beer. Regardless of spending their days working out in the yard, sleeping, or having an eight-hour cookout. Ginger ale is always a good reward.

The 24-pack of delicious ginger beer is what brings the brotherhood together. Regardless of the state of society, a few (or 24) ginger beers with the boys makes the problems go away. Haley and I spend our hours attempting to make substantial plans for our friends. I would lose less hair and be more sane if I could text the friend group chat and say I got ginger beer, who wants to hang out?

What else gets boys more enthused than trucks? Everything about the truck, the engine, the horsepower, and everything else is what keeps boys up at night (but in a positive way). When one boy in the friend group purchases a new truck, women would think that the cure for cancer has been found. But in reality, Chad’s mom just spent his paycheck to boost Chad’s ego.

What pairs nicely with ginger beers and trucks… an Xbox. The debate between Xbox and Playstations is a massive one. But nothing ruins the brotherhood. After dinner, before school, and after school, every male sits in their gaming chair and connects their headset to get down to business with the boys. As of right now, Fortnite is the go-to game. With ginger beer in one hand, a controller in the other, there are no problems in the world.

Drip. Drip is one of, if not the most important part of being a boy. The day when boys decide to switch up their outfits is the day they feel the most proud driving in their truck. With the new Travis Scott merch, everybody put that on their wishlist from Santa. The new and fresh outfit is just another sweat that they claim is from a “hype beast” brand.

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About the Contributors
Lauren Kinney, Social Media Editor
Haley Schmela, Staff Writer
Haley Schmela is an opinion writer who is never afraid, to tell the truth.  She is the paper's newest addition and they are somewhat grateful to have her other than the fact she won't stop saying "Go Avs!"

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